kolehiyala kuno

mood: *patience...*
hello, blog. tagal na naman akong hindi nakapag-update. kekekeke.
school kasi eh. langya. SCHOOL parin ang tawag. nyehe. WAAAAAK. wala lang. gusto ko magwala. gusto ko talaga magwala. pero feeling ko delikado na ang blog ko.
meron nang certain connections.

i have lost my sanctuary.

haaaay naku. andami ko pa namang gustong/kailangang ipagsigawan sa INTARWEBS...kaya lang..kekeke. delikado. hindi pwedeng malaman ng parents. delikado. kekeke.

so. ANO NA NGA BA ANG NANGYARI KAY NADINE/DIDZ/ANGEL/EIJII?!!! (langya, ang dami kong pangalan.)
eto, busy sa school..plates plates plates.
eto, inlab parin kay SungMin..palala na nang palala. (will elaborate later)
eto, naga-apply sa UP AME...keke. scary.
eto, namumulubi.
eto...buhay parin. tsk. (mahaba-habang entry ititch...)

oo! todo SungMin parin...i lurve him more than ever <3 pramis, malabo na ako. kekeke. kapag nagkaron ng girlfriend 'tong si oppa, guguho ang mundo ko...kekeke. at alam naman natin kung ano ang nangyayari kapag gumuguho ang mundo ko.
we've been there. we've seen that. we dun wanna go baaaack.
actually~! salamat sa SJPhilippines.tk nakahanap ako ng way para panoorin yung ChunJi radio nya!!! LIVE!!! XDDD WAAAHHHHHH...i ♥ teh INTARWEBS..so..yun, medyo nakakaubos ng oras, kekeke. pero still, i looooove him so. it's more than just a fandom. :[ im such a loser. im in love with a pop idol...IM A LOSER!!! XDDD putek.
but he's so adooooraaaable...

kekeke. UP AME...the application scares me. XD buti na lang maraming mababait na peoples :3 (kung may AME people, co-apps and members na maligaw sa blog ko, HELLO PO~ <3) kekeke.
umm...hi, kuya "buddy". :D gudlak na lang satin. lol.

ay...i miss a lot of people. :[ mmmm...marami akong mga hinahanap-hanap...
Kaye: uu nga. may utang tayong cake sa isa't isa....kekeke.

Lishey: i miss you too, lovey...sorry hindi na ko nakakadalaw..super busy kasi eh..pramis dadalaw ako kapag may oras.. = 3 = alabshuuuuu <333

Nikshae: BRUJA. hindi ka nagte-text, hindi ka tumatawag, hindi mo sinasagot tawag ko, at huling beses na kinausap mo ako ay para magpasabi sa mom mo na kailangan nyo magupsap?! i smell something FISHY...and it's NOT DongHae. nyuuurrrr....impakta ka talaga, miss na kitaaaa. anu nangyari sayuuuu...takte, magsesend nga ng note sa DA, wala namang laman. impaktaaaaaa.

Ma'am Rox: maaaaaaaam rooooooox..waaah..may utang pa ko senyo na drawing..huhuhu..sorry poooo > x <;; someday po, maam, pramis. bago mag-2008..kekeke. sorry po!

kekeke..may sasabihin pa ba ako? magpapaulan na lang ako ng SungMin-ness...gusto ko sana maglagay ng drawings kaya lang...may mailalagay ba ako?! kekekeke. di bale, kapag nakapag-drawing at nakapag-scan na ako, maglalagay rin ako dito...kahit nasa DA ko na, ita-thumb ko parin dito. para maging makulay kahit papaano ang aking malungkot at madilim na blog. *boba kasi sa CSS ehh.*.

SUNGMIN AND FOOD...

(kunyari KALABASA si RyeoWook...anu kaya lasa nun..YAAAAK. xet.)

(HOLY KAMOTE. hanapin nyo ang kamay ni RyeoWook...BAKIT YAN NANDYAN?! BAKEEET?! BITAWAN MO SI SUNGMIN!!! XDDD takteng kamay yan..) anyway...

SUNGMIN BEING EMO...

(but WHYYY does it make me smile?!)

(aaaawww...gusto kong burahin yung kung ano mang nakasulat..tssss. anu yun? EUDIPOA?! wth...*stabstab*)

PRINCESS SUNGMIN...

(uhh...promotional pic to para sa movie nila *which will come out in about a week, btw. WAH..i wanna be in KOREA..* oh my gulay...sweetie, anung ginawa nila sayo? you're all pink and fluffy...wth?! pero cute yung SungMin doll..Dream of Doll ba yan? iwantit..iwantit...iwantHIM.)

<3...

i love this pic of him :3 see, he's dreaming..about ME. lol, what?! kekeke. waaaahh...sweet smile makes my heart melt...oppaaaaa saranghaaaeeee <3 kyoptaaaaaa XDDD kekekeke.

the fangirl returns..updates!

okay, get ready for a rather looooong entry...
i think i can break it down to 4 main points..

• first off, i kinda lost my password weeks ago, which is why i havent posted since then...
i just got it back a while ago.

• next...my pc has been really bitchy lately...sometimes it's okay for a while but then starts acting up again, usually after someone plays a couple rounds of Diablo...litse ka. i'll get it reformatted when my brother's not busy anymore...

• my parents want to go to Bicol...*sigh* at the start of the summer vacation, i really, really wanted to go...but now that i only have a few weeks left, i dont want to waste any of it there....i want to spend my summer in front of my pc, dammit!!! gaaaaah...apparently, we'll leave on thursday..or friday...and come back at the end of the month...hello? like..wtf, WHAT ABOUT TEH INTERWEBS?! I NEED TEH INTERWEBS!!!

• im an obsessed fangirl...and it's starting to reach dangerous stage...

♥ okay. if nothing of the above interests you, you can stop reading now, because i'll just be explaining the points from this point on, mmkay? ♥

right. where were we?
ah yes...the password thing...the whole google account thing kinda annoys me...it makes things so damn complicated...yeech. need i say more?
ugh..my pc!!!! darn it. every other night, someone nags me to go to sleep so he can use my computer. i swear, sometimes my pc runs so smoothly and then, after he uses it, it starts acting up again!! MY COMPUTER IS NOT FOR GAMING. the computers in this house have certain purposes. my mom's laptop is mostly for her work stuff. my brother's pc is for his downloads and games. and MY PC IS FOR EDITING. you hear me?! i dont even know why all those games are installed here...takte talaga. imagine being told "dali na, matulog ka na, para makapaglaro ako!" by someone you're not even related to.
do0d, sorry a, pero nakakainis talaga eh. you can stay in the house as long as you like, sige, ayus lang, im kinda used to having you around the house anyway. BUT DRIVING ME OUT OF MY COMFORT ZONE IS A TICKET TO HELL. you're lucky my parents and brothers like you.

okay..that was really mean... > . >
really really mean...sorry..but..yeah. kailangan maglabas ng galit somewhere...
half of me wishes he'd read this..the other half wishes he'd just get off my case. lol.

and about that vacation thing...i know my dad really wants to go home. i know my mom really wants to go to the beach and i understand that...im not saying i dont want to go...im just saying i wont like it.
T . T it's not that difficult to understand, isnt it? mid june, i start going to college...and my friends will be in LB and all over the place and we'd all be out of contact and busy with schoolwork and all that...it's going to be so different...being underneath my bed and in front of my pc is the situation i cling on to so that i feel as if everything is going to be okay and normal and not different...i know im going to have to accept the changes sooner or later but..it's my comfort zone...Nixxie and Rin-chan and i were planning on a part 2 as well...but now that i have to leave for a week, that's gonna be kinda difficult...especially because after summer vacation, Rin will be focusing on her studies and Nix will be in LB...even Kaye will be in LB!! and im going to be all sad and busy here at home...and..and..i need my SungMin oppa!!! *cries* (omg that was...wrong....XD)
im not really in the mood to explain all that....

finally...i'm a fangirl...i've been like this for..probably about a month now...it's..wonderful...lol...
i'm...uhh...dare i say it? in love?! LOL. it's really scaring me though..like, really really scary...D: i'm always thinking about HIM...it's always HIM in my head...none of his bandmates, not even anyone from the other band, just HIM...
SungMinnie oppa~
this whole fangirl thing really hit me hard...but i dont think i've ever been happier...it feels so nice to daydream about the day we'll meet...but then..there's that lingering thought at the back of my head nagging me that it's never going to happen....i'd like to tell myself that "it might." but we all know it's impossible..it's NOT near impossible...IT IS impossible...so why do i even get my hopes up? because it feels great, i guess...even though i dont drink alcohol, i think this fandom is like getting drunk...you feel so light and all that, like you're on top of the world...but you start throwing up and you fall unconscious and your head hurts like hell...then you have to move on....
so tell me this, why on earth am i putting myself through this knowing that i'll just throw it all way eventually?
why? and dont tell me that it's because love just really is like that, because this is different. I'm in love with a korean popstar?! and so are thousands of other asian girls..possibly even non-asian girls..i dont care why they're putting themselves up to this slow torture, but why am I doing it? arent i supposed to be smarter than this?
am i that desperate about distracting myself from the world that im willing to put myself through something that'll bring me nothing in the end?
and while im typing this, i'm listening to his voice singing...laugh all you want, but it melts my heart...it does.
(Someone Special - SungMin, Lina, Dana)

what on earth is wrong with me...